Sleepless night

Couldnt sleep the whole night
woke up too late last night.
rolling on the bed the whole day
Ended up abit half dead during the lecture.

time passes quite fast thou
w/o realising what happened and the lecture is over.
went cotton on to buy the berms i being eying on during my bday
Realised it's 70% discount so i bought 1 brown and 1 black, lol
typical kiasu Singaporean

Dinner with my parents@Changi V
seriously they eat like pig lidat
Ate 3hor fun, went Hougang Mall to eat orh wah.
Chit chat with them, quite fun, especially my dad.

When driving home, he asked me need to go straight or turn left anot
i'm like hahaha, funny ar.
My mum is like stop spiking ur son.
She started all her philosophy again, blah blah blah.
i'm like yayaya.

i think this song suits me

闭上眼睛忍住呼吸
暂时要和世界脱离
就快要学会不再想你
却听见不断跳动的心
我允许了你
让爱的自由还给你
我允许了自己
承受这悲伤到天明
我不愿放弃却要故意默默允许
我答应自己爱你的心绝口不提
总是以为终究化作云淡风轻
爱你到底
痛了自己
我不愿放弃却要故意默默允许
我答应自己爱你的心绝口不提
所有结局在这夜里都已成形
爱到了底
痛的是我的真心


i still think this song suits me more than Edmond. lol

sealed it away

Hate and love is only a thin line apart
to love is to be hurt
to hate is to stop urself from being hurt


爱与恨只是一线之差
爱得越深，恨得越深

hatred is the best medicine
at least it doesnt make some one feels terrible
Ultimately, let time heals all wound

Afew quotes i came across, quite meaningful.

NoNo is so ke lian =(

Sleep sleep sleep

Slept my sunday away
woke up at 8-9pm, damn sian
One studying day gone just lidat + ytd = 2 days

At home no mood to study, read manga all the way until now.
Hopefully tml can study.
from 4pm to 10pm in school. lol

tired

tuition ended well
initially wasnt feeling well.
i think must be the Vodka/Martel/Tequila mixture
Morning lao sai like hell xia
damn weak when i reached her place

Now gonna take an afternoon nap
go later go hougang study, can buy my berms from cotton on.
But ex xia =(

Jenny's Bachelor Party

Met up with Jenny around 7pm @cck
Tai reached slightly later, around 7.20pm
took 300 to her place and walked till everyone was sweating.
When we reached her place, all the kfc delivery and pizza hut delivery was there alr.
All of us enjoyed the feast, she took out a Martel & a Tequila

Initially we played Black jack, but i felt the flow was too slow
Ended up we played smallest card drink.
I was quite shocked Jenny didnt drink much
the Ang Moh friend Samantha didnt drink much too.
Charmaine was the only one drinking, with mixer of course.
Only Tai and i sorta on the rocks, but in the end Tai drank abit of coke to wash off the Tequila taste.

Shared cab with Jenny & Venecia
Reached St James around 11pm
hang out awhile at Boiler, went to power house shortly cuz Boiler got no dance floor.
The first thing Tai and i did was hitting the Podium
But after awhile got bored and we went back to find them.
Venecia was talking to another one of their sec sch friend, Angela.
Wasnt drunk, but drank quite alot there.
Cuz they bought alot of jug so i just koped, guess the % was pretty low.

We were stoning for awhile, then after that Tai saw his friend, Paul, and they went out to smoke.
But after their smoking break we stayed at the dance floor the whole night.
First time ever, i was surrounded by girls and i'm not dancing with tai.
tai kept pushing me urging me to go ahead.
the scenerio was quite funny.
For the first time, i'm really looking at what's around me.

Everything was fun i can say, normally i'll isolate at one corner or dance with the guys only.
But this time round, i don't know how to describe.
Perhaps no restriction, i don't know.
Or maybe it's this thing that made me do this?
I dont know too, it's just something i wouldnt thought of doing.
Never ever i can say.

Things change, people do.
I learn it thru the hard way.

While waiting for the train
Chatted with Tai, then after awhile, Paul's friend, came to talk to us.
She's damn good man, she can keep talking and talking and talking.
Keep talking and talking until i abit amazed, at how can she talk bout anything under the sky.
Paul was talking bout how good looking i am, i was quite shocked too.
Normally where got people talk bout such thing one, whether is he saying for fun or not.
Inside me, i'm damn high la of course.
But i kept quiet and laugh it off.

signing off at 8am, need to wake up at 12pm for tuitions.
Sucks

Ikea

took 61 tgt with Larine
Larine accompany me to Ikea thou she can cross the road which was faster.
Dinner with the rest, didnt eat much since i had a heavy tea break.
So i ate a Potato Salad & a chicken wing.
Baoli bought 2 wine glass *she broke one today*
they were busily helping her to wrap it.
Hongwei ended up did the best among the rest.

Bought my white leather shoe from Pedro
took a cab back home for mj.
Baoli sang for me all the way back home
Quite nice listening to her sing.
During Mj, everything was fine until the song 最长的电影
I merely replayed it, then Edmond started singing 再给我1hour.
Abit du lan, kept quiet for awhile.
Then during the mj, he suan me abit more then i buey lun alr.
i poke him back, then he point at the photo frame.
When he pointed at the photo frame
my whole weeks accumulated du lan-ness reached the limit.

Things got abit nasty, but of all the thing.
The worst was for Baoli, i can get du lan and everything.
But i think Baoli was very poor thing, she kanna all the shit at the end.

My wound had split opened once again.
It was fucking painful.
Baoli, so far being very nice to me, i guess she had suffered quite an amount of dmg last night

chit chat

4/17/09

Chit chat with wt & xf again.
again, xf needs to leave early.
xf needs to watch the sister's convocation
i'm imaging myself graduating in 2 years time
So left with wt and I as usual.

We walked around the school few rounds but failed to find any empty benches.
So we went to Comp lab to do our work/gossip
Ended up we gossip for 2hours instead of studying again.
The both of us can never study together, we will end up chit chatting the whole day.

Evening had Micro lecture tgt with Larine.
Both of us are like 2 mice scurrying around
Taking plates and koping food from the convocation.
I kept taking the shepherd pie and roti john.
Larine kept hitting me and pulling me every where
"Why are you wearing green!!! Everyone's wearing BLACK!!! U're standing out la, n you still dare to take so much food!!!!"

Halfway during lecture, went out to take photos.
Took photos for 15min plus
The mother really damn good man
kept suggesting different pose and location to take photo

我的心真的受伤了

灯光也暗了 音乐低声了
我的心开始想念了
口中的棉花糖也融化了
窗外阴天了 人是无聊了
我的心开始想你了
电话响起了 你要说话了
还以为你心里对我又想念了
怎么你声音变得冷淡了
是你变了 是你变了
灯光熄灭了 音乐静止了
滴下的眼泪已停不住了
天下起雨了 人是不快乐
我的心真的受伤了
电话响起了 你要说话了
还以为你心里对我又想念了
怎么你声音变得冷淡了
是你变了 是你变了
灯光熄灭了 音乐静止了
滴下的眼泪已停不住了
天下起雨了 人是不快乐
我的心真的受伤了
我的心真的受伤了


By Zhang Xue You, I like this song.
Baoli sang it so nice.

Little Miss grumpy

One day, Mr Happy saw Miss Grumpy.

Mr Happy: Good morning Miss Grumpy
Miss Grumpy: what's so good about the morning?
Mr Happy: hahaha, it's good morning for a reason Miss Grumpy
Miss Grumpy: it's not good at all Mr Happy, you think everyone is as happy as you.
Mr Happy: hahaha, tell me about it Miss Grumpy.
Miss Grumpy: i broke up with my Mr Z last night
Mr Happy: hahaha, what? Again? What happened this time?
Miss Grumpy: Mr Z fails to sms me consistently, so I broke up with him.
Mr Happy: Isn't that the same as Mr Y?
Miss Grumpy: No, Mr Y fails to call me every night.
Mr Happy: Isn't that what happened to Mr X?
Miss Grumpy: Mr X doesn't care about me.
Mr Happy: hahaha, don't worry Miss Grumpy. One day you will find your true love and both of you will be happily ever after.

10 Years down the road

Mr Happy: Good Morning Miss Grumpy
Miss Grumpy: what's so good about the morning?
Mr Happy: hahaha, it's good morning for a reason Miss Grumpy
Miss Grumpy: yaya, whatever!
Mr Happy: What happen this time Miss grumpy? Tell me about it.
Miss Grumpy: it goes for Mr A, blah blah blah, Mr B, blah blah blah, Mr C, blah blah blah.
Mr Happy: hahaha, Miss Grumpy, don't be so grumpy anymore. Come, let us be together.
Miss Grumpy: really? *touched*

30years down the road

Mr Optimistic: Good morning Miss Grumpy, where's Mr Happy?
Miss Grumpy: we divorced and don't ask me why.
Mr Optimistic: sure sure, have a nice day.
Miss Grumpy: yaya, whatever!

Conversation with my parents

Conversation

Dad: She got sms u? got call u?
Lionel: never
Dad: why never?
Lionel: never means never la
Dad: never even asked you how are you?
Lionel: never
Dad: huh, this kinda girl u still thinking of her?
Lionel: never
Dad: see your face, bu lui bu lui wan, look like some one just dumped you
Lionel: some one did dump me what
Dad: then dont think alr la
Lionel: orh
Dad: orh 你的头 orh
Lionel: aiya, ya la ya la
Dad: this girl can really just dump you and dont contact you ar
Lionel: people exam what
Dad: my son also exam what
Lionel: ya la ya la ya la

Exact same conversation, exact same sentence, exact same answer exact same question for the past 1 week.
Give me a break, alamak!!!

Conversation
Mum: later see her in Hougang how
Lionel: what how?
Mum: what you want me to do
Lionel: what what you want me to do?
Mum: aiya, what u want me to do la.
Lionel: just cooked la
Mum: want me to say hi
Lionel: up to you la
Mum: she got face come see me?
Dad: blah blah blah
Mum: blah blah blah
Dad: blah blah blah

Slowly but surely, i got left out from their conversation.
Parents are running out of topic, nowadays, i'm their main topic.
One good thing, they started giving me money out of the blue.
Wu eh bo eh, put $50 on the table.
Wu eh bo eh, top up $50 in my ez link card.
like wah!!!

Expense

Bought a shirt for $59.90
Damn ex come to think of it
Didnt know why i buy that shirt for, like so waste money.
I think $59.90 i can buy 4 long sleeve shirt.
But hack la, also spend alr.
Wanted to buy shorts, but ended up didnt buy.
The cutting is abit wrong, so didnt wanna buy.

Most prob going to Top Man or Cotton On or places lidat to get the shorts.
Tml most prob going to get my Pedro white leather shoe, but i didnt know what to wear for tml.
Hack la, maybe tml wake up see whatever's ready then i'll wear it.

O town

I thought i was strong enough, but i was wrong
it's the fact that, i treasure her more than she treasures me.

You know I'd fight for you but how could I fight somone who isn't
even there I've had the rest of you now I want the best
of you I don't care if that's not fair

Cuz I want it all
Or nothing at all
There's nowhere left to fall
When you reach the bottom it's now or never
Is it all
Or are we just friends
Is this how it ends
With a simple telephone call 
You leave me here with nothing at all

恨

我恨我自己没有用
我恨我自己很无奈
我恨我自己这样犯贱
我恨我自己无法掌握自己的幸福
我恨我自己无法控制自己的情绪
我恨我自己

我恨事实是这样的残酷
我恨她那么的冷酷无情
我恨她所作的决定
我恨她所作的一切
我恨我自己无法抛开一切
渐渐得让她掌握我的一切
一切画面犹如电影班浮现在我脑海里

quite a nice song =)

Change of Image

Plan to change my image
got sick of my jacket dressing, slippers or adidas superstar
Need to take out everything in my wardrobe
Stop wearing all my T-shirts & jackets


Packed everything with button shirt, be it long or short sleeve.
Buy a few nice shorts and a white colour leather shoe.
that's what i'm planning to do.
Got a black leather shoe to go with my jeans
Now i only need to get white leather shoe & a shorts and i'm ready to go

hitch a ride

chatted with wt for too long, 30min late for lecture
Charm and Crens sat behind me, i sat beside Larine
Couldnt really concentrate during the 3hr lecture
Didnt talk to Larine much also, dont know why also
Maybe abit emo, so didnt feel like talking


During the 15min break, i just lied on the table
Closed my eyes, rest awhile
Larine was gone n i didnt know.
Suddenly, some one from the back put the arm over my shoulder
had a shocked, but it was comfortable.
Comfortable as in, i feel like somehow, i'm not alone kinda thing.
I opened my eyes, saw Charm, she was asking me am i alright n stuff lidat.


The whole lecture, i didnt really look at Larine too.
Maybe abit pai seh, cuz i didnt go for afew lectures.
After the lesson, she went to popular and i went off with Charm.
But ended up i took Crens car home, since she's driving back to sk.
get to know her friend, Xinyi.
Went home tgt, but i was so tired i dozed off at the back.


Quite pai seh again, cuz normally quite rude to sleep when people is driving.
But i just couldnt resist the temptation.
It's like a childhood thing, since young when i couldnt sleep, my father will drive me around until i dozed off in the car.
Thats why, even if i'm not tired, i'll automatically dozed off on a car.


So yap, thanks crens for the ride, nice knowing you Xinyi.
I heard both ur conversation, okie!! lol

Lunch@Sim

Lunch@Sim with my Jie meis
Chit chat for few hours
talk bout me, bout wt & why xf nowadays so quiet

when xf left@2pm
wt and i went to the library to chit chat for another few hours
talked bout ideal partner
what we see in our partner
talking bout seeing myself like her now

Ended up we reached a conclusion
that's to go learn baking tgt
She told me it's useless to learn cooking
why not learn baking, that will be better.

Come to think of it, i agree with her.
It's better to learn baking, in future can bake those heart shape cookies
or bake cake during people's birthday.
That will be so nice and sweet.
Clara mentioned bout baking, but we just briefly talk thru it.
After analysing it with wt, baking sounds like a good thing

Sorta like a plus thing
maybe she's gonna learn with Kang Li, then all of us can learn tgt (inclusive of Clara, but had to ask her first)

this song again

再给我两分钟 让我把记忆结成冰 别融化了眼泪 你妆都花了 要我怎么记得 记得你叫我忘了吧 记得你叫我忘了吧 你说你会哭 不是因为在乎

再给我两分钟 让我把记忆结成冰 别融化了眼泪 你妆都花了 要我怎么记得 记得你叫我忘了吧 记得你叫我忘了吧 你说你会哭 不是因为在乎

再给我两分钟 让我把记忆结成冰 别融化了眼泪 你妆都花了 要我怎么记得 记得你叫我忘了吧 记得你叫我忘了吧 你说你会哭 不是因为在乎

再给我两分钟 让我把记忆结成冰 别融化了眼泪 你妆都花了 要我怎么记得 记得你叫我忘了吧 记得你叫我忘了吧 你说你会哭 不是因为在乎


This song started popping out again, kept singing this line for like? 2hr?

New Fave song

总是不经意的想起
你喜欢哼的那首歌曲
一样温柔低吟
依旧牵动我的心
我曾经寻寻觅觅
想在文字里寻找爱情
才发现最美的诗句
原来都在你眸里

爱是你眼里的一首情歌
轻扬着飘逸旋律
让我不知不觉的陶醉在
你缠绕的深情
爱是你眼里的一首情歌
轻拨弄我的心弦
让我不由自主更
深爱着你

Nice and touching, very meaningful

GV to cancel ticket

Woke up at 11am to go hbf
Damn early, super not enough sleep xia.
Met up with Wu and Baoli for lunch then went to do the ticket.
Quite fast thou, went there chop chop replaced ticket reprint ticket then done alr.
But ended up got to cancel tuition, stayed at hbf Mac studied the whole afternoon.


hbf/Vivo, so much memories there.
do my work, surf abit of net, think abit of her
con't to do my work & everything until 6.30pm.
meet up with the rest at 6.50pm

First time seeing the legendary Juliana
Think she's quite friendly, hahaha
During the movie, first time ever in my life too, throwing popcorns at each other.
Was quite fun, if not for the heavy dinner i would have eaten the popcorn instead of throwing them around.

'The knowing' not very nice but definitely better than Dragon Ball.
When the show ended, slowly walked down forever21, Topshop, River Island, Poohs and Bears. Everyone was quiet too, started day dreaming too.

Just couldnt help it la, there's an auto-trigger stuck in my head.
Wondering what she's doing now, probably mugging for exam, waiting for exam to end then can enjoy after the exam.

Dinner@Ishi Mura

to Clara

Thanks for sharing Kun with me =)
psps for being a light bulb =P

Conversation with Clara

had a funny and weird conversation with Clara
I really dont know whether is it funny or weird
but it's really funny.
I dont know how to put it but yap, hahaha

I dont mind having one more Jie Mei, lol.
Clara, wanna be Jie Mei anot?
I got so many jie mei le, another one more doesnt matter de. lol

Let's wait till kun's exam over and ahem ahem, lol.
You know, he knows, i know.
But it's really okie wan la, hahahaha.
*shy*

P.S the last part of our conversation, what i was trying to bring across was "low crime doesnt mean no crime", but i thought was "low crime means no crime"

Studying@Yishun Library

Studied at Yishun Library with Kun
At this pace i'm going i think i'm gonna fail my exam xia.
Die die super die, zZz.

Ate at this Japanese Village
not bad xia, the food there quite nice
most prob i'll be returning there to eat if possible.

Nuan at Kun's house after dinner and went straight to AMK Mac
studied awhile then all the issues starts popping out
Booking of Movie tickets and no. of people going
Damn sian xia, i took around 1h to settle everything
By the time settled alr Kun & Clara wanted to leave soon
Ended up didnt study much at night

That's beside the point
Now i'm going to cancel tuition tml
wake up early, reach HBF early
if everything failed, had to buy another 5 tickets.
I dont see this as part of my duty
Wu doesnt think i need to go to that extend too
If i'm the only one who miscom, nothing to say, Wu had the same conclusion as me
If 2 people reached the same conclusion, it's really not my duty of care.

But if i'm gonna do all this right
Should at least let me know i'm appreciated for doing all this
Dont think that it's 应该的 (extracted from Wu)

There's nothing as 应该的
everything is give and take one.
We're going the extra mile, doing the extra work
Wu had to rearrange his side, i need to cancel my schedule.
Do you know ur sms was very rude and sarcastic?

Respect is earned, not given.
You wanna change, we can help you
what have i been doing all these years?
What have Mong, Kok yee & Dong done all these years?
Your friend Alan? Giant?

Dont take things for granted until you lose it
Treasure things around you before it's too late.
That applies for me, for you, for everyone.
Everything i say, you always dont listen one
Even if you listen, next moment u face black black with me
but all these is for your own good.
You have your principle, but i have my pride.

P.S Sat i wasnt late, i reached at 435pm, i was waiting for Baoli. I changed my mind when she said she be reaching by 5.30pm instead of 5pm.

Photos

My mum removed all her photos.
Asked me not to look at the photos anymore.
Asked me to blue tooth them my photos so i did.

Ended up they say they gonna go back to their company to find a gf for me
I'm like wth, totally speechless, zZz.

Quote from friends over the week

Denial:

* Example - "I feel fine."; "This can't be happening, not to me!,"

Anger:

* Example - "Why me? It's not fair!"; "How can this happen to me!"; "Who is to blame?"

Bargaining:

* Example - "Just let me live to see my children graduate."; "I'll do anything for a few more days."; "I will give my life savings if..."

Depression:

* Example - "I'm so sad, why bother with anything?"; "I'm going to die . . . What's the point?"; "I miss my loved one, why go on?"

Acceptance
Example - "It's going to be okay."; "I can handle it with change" "It's time to move on"

*********************************************************************************************

These are some actions and virtues you practice on people on a daily basis

Family and Loved ones: Treasure, Cherish and Sacrifice.
Yourself: Love yourself, Prioritize and Acceptance of limits.
Friends: Patience, Presence and Choice

Enemies or ppl who refuse to get off your back: IGNORE, if they get overboard. TAKE ACTION. GET EVEN.

*********************************************************************************************

Always love yourself more than loving others
Eventually you wouldnt get hurt

*********************************************************************************************

You need some one who can tolerate all your nonsense
If those who cant tolerate your nonsense, they are not yours to begin with

*********************************************************************************************

Telling a white lie is by helping urself and helping others
Ended up, you be happy the person be happy and everyone will be happy.

*********************************************************************************************

Loving yourself is simply prioritizing your FUTURE as the topmost thing along with family friends and.... 'love'

simply because years from now, people may move on, things will change, but your future still remains with you.
Loving yourself means making yourself so much more than just a simple person,
Social skills, Hobbies, Languages, Musical Instruments, Physical, Career, Money, Cars, House, Ambition, Shopping.
if you hone urself to be so much more, and always remain sincere and nice, when love fails on you. you take a step back in life, but you still have so much more there for yourself.

YES YOU CAN ALWAYS EMO, YOU CAN BE SAD.
but don't let it destroy your future away, or compromise a huge chunk of it.
remember that life ALWAYS has more than one priority at anytime, and most of the time, they include studies and family.

Edmond told me

做人要假一点
Somehow sounded quite familiar
heard of it some where before, this trait of being "too straight forward or maybe not really straight forward but some where there" will offend pple easily.

He says it's okie to tell lies some times
Tell lie, he happy, you happy everyone happy.
I dont know whether issit being hypocritical anot

Dinner@Chinatown

my parents favourite hang out place.
Looking at all the old people there
Couldnt help it but to imagine my parents gonna be like one of them soon, hanging out there everyday or maybe day and night.

Had their favourite fish
Enjoy their company and realised how much i had missed out
My parents always go out in pair & i believed they feel happier when i'm around with them.
I rmb what Estee use to tell me bout family value and how everyone has to make an effort and play a part so that the family can work.

My dad told me dont hurry to get into another r/s
enjoy singlehood and the whole night my parents are pointing at girls, say this one we dont like that one still okie dont get this kind that one not bad blah blah blah.
I think i need to tell them i'm interested in guys, show them the one i kissed Tai and made out with Wu.

Declare once and for all, i'm not NIANG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Every guy has it's feminine side.

The song from my mum

不看你的眼
不看你的眉
看了心里都是你
忘了我是谁
不看你的眼
不看你的眉
看的时候心里跳
看过以后眼泪垂
不看你的眼
不看你的眉
不看你也爱上你
忘了我是谁
忘了我是谁

this was the song she asked me to send to Chloe